P.S. #6: Interference
Written and Produced by Rae Lundberg
Content Warnings (Click to expand)
Discussion of death, audio distortion
[TAPE RECORDER CLICKS ON.] NICHOLAS: Postmaster Nicholas Best speaking. The date is, uh, March 4th, 2012, and this is the entrance interview for Valencia Torres. VAL: Are you sure this is necessary? NICHOLAS: I don’t know about “necessary,” that’s–that’s above my head, but I am required to record your responses to a few questions. I guess technically it says I should write them down, but I never learned shorthand, so– VAL: Fine. Just get on with it. NICHOLAS: You’ve already had a letter from me on behalf of Gilt City, but allow me to personally welcome you to the ranks of the Night Post. VAL: Is that a question? NICHOLAS: Well, no, I was– VAL: I’m sure you already know all the relevant facts about me. Where I’m from, how I fucked up to get here. So I’m guessing you wanna ask about how I feel. NICHOLAS: Uh, well, specifically…what are you…I mean– VAL: You’re not very good at this, are you? NICHOLAS: This is my first time interviewing a new hire, and– VAL: “Hire”? NICHOLAS: Sorry, I…as I say, I’m new to the job. So why don’t you…tell me about that. About how you feel. VAL: How did you feel when the Night Post stole your future? When you got thrown into a job you didn’t want, permanently, one that guarantees you’ll be harassed by ghosts and hated by your neighbors for the rest of your life? (pause) Well? Is there a tape around here with your name on it? This clunker looks old enough. What did you tell the nice Postmaster when they asked if you were happy to be here? NICHOLAS: I didn’t ask–look, Mx. Torres– VAL: Just Val. NICHOLAS: I understand your anger, Val. VAL: I don’t give a shit if you understand it. NICHOLAS: Of course. But we’re in this together, you know. VAL: How do you say that with a smile on your face? How do you come in to work every day and sort mail for people who think you’re cursed, or something less than human? How do you collect your paycheck from the city that made you a prisoner and give it all back in rent to the same bastards who spit on you? NICHOLAS: It kind of seems like you’re interviewing me. VAL: Forget it. I don’t care anyway. NICHOLAS: You have a very bleak view of the situation. Maybe you’ll find it’s not as bad as you think. VAL: I’m from here, remember? From the Skelter, I mean. Not like those assholes in the city who pretend the mail delivers itself and the monsters aren’t real. I know how this works. NICHOLAS: Then you already know what we’re capable of adapting to. VAL: You’re telling me to get over it because that’s just how life is out here. NICHOLAS: I’m saying you can get used to it. It won’t sting as much, in time. VAL: I’m not sure whether I hope that’s true or not. NICHOLAS: (after a pause, softly) What future did they steal from you, Val? VAL: (a pause) Fuck this. [A CHAIR SCRAPES, AND THE RECORDER CLICKS OFF. AFTER A MOMENT, IT TURNS BACK ON.] NICHOLAS: Today is November 22nd, 2014. This is Postmaster Nicholas Best, interviewing Clementine Keys. (pause) Ms. Keys, I just wanted to say how sorry I am for your loss. Tommy Lee was a good courier, and more importantly, a good man. CLEMENTINE: Thank you. I…sorry, I-I guess I’m still kind of in shock? I knew I’d have to take his place one day, but I didn’t think it would happen for a long time. NICHOLAS: Your father was gone too soon. Like many of us. CLEMENTINE: I…um–I’m having trouble wrapping my head around it. I mean, everyone knows it’s a dangerous job, especially on the Skelter routes, but he never really talked to me about his work. I didn’t know what he really went through. (pause) Suppose I’m about to find out. NICHOLAS: We have to bear so much uncertainty. It must be hard, not knowing how he died. But you seem to be holding up well. CLEMENTINE: My dad was the superstitious type. Not a doomsayer, but always kind of grim and vague, you know? NICHOLAS: Sure. CLEMENTINE: He said our place at the Post was our curse. The curse of the Keys family. It felt so inevitable. He used to say, not everything happens for a reason, but there’s always a reason in it. Always some meaning you can uncover, if you look. NICHOLAS: And have you found the meaning? CLEMENTINE: No, but I’ll keep looking. I believe that this place is complicated, not just the two parts everyone divides it into. That’s the purpose of us pigeons, right? Crossing those invisible lines so everyone can pretend they’re safe on one side or the other. NICHOLAS So you see the couriers as some kind of…protectors? CLEMENTINE: Not protectors, more like…offerings. A traditional bargain with the land. NICHOLAS: In exchange for what? CLEMENTINE: I don’t know. Do pennies know why they’re thrown into wishing wells? NICHOLAS: Hm. That’s an interesting perspective. It’s nice, at least, to hear from someone with a relatively positive view of the Post. CLEMENTINE: (pause) I don’t blame you, Mr. Best. NICHOLAS: I’m sorry? CLEMENTINE: You were a good friend to my father. I know you would have done anything you could to help him. NICHOLAS: I– thank you, I appreciate that. I hope you can put the same trust in me as he did. CLEMENTINE: I…I hope so too. NICHOLAS: I understand it can be difficult to trust in a situation like this, where you don’t know anyone’s motivations. CLEMENTINE: How do you mean? NICHOLAS: Well, take your hypothesis about the bargain, or, or the wishing well. Who’s making the deal? Who’s throwing the penny? [IN THE BACKGROUND, THE LOW BUZZ OF STATIC, OR POSSIBLY TAPE HISS.] CLEMENTINE: As in the Governor, or do you mean like in a cosmic sense…? [AS NICHOLAS SPEAKS, THE STATIC GROWS LOUDER.] NICHOLAS: Not anyone in the specific, just– What happened to Tommy Lee should not have happened. What happened to my predecessor should not have happened. And viewed together, those things can seem– [NICK CUTS OFF AS THE STATIC RISES ALMOST LOUD ENOUGH TO DROWN HIM OUT.] CLEMENTINE: Mr. Best? NICHOLAS: –Overwhelming. [THE BUZZING STOPS ABRUPTLY WITH THE END OF HIS SENTENCE.] NICHOLAS: Sometimes the big picture is just too big. We can only grapple with the strokes at eye level. CLEMENTINE: (amused) Now you sound like him. NICHOLAS: I’ll take the compliment. [THE TAPE RECORDER SHUTS OFF, THEN BACK ON AGAIN.] NICHOLAS: Postmaster Best here, speaking with Milo Cylix-Wilder. Today’s date is August 10th, 2020. (pause) Can I…can I get you some water? You look– MILO: No. NICHOLAS: I do wish we were meeting under better circumstances. MILO: What’s with the tape recorder? Are you investigating me? NICHOLAS: No, of course not. MILO: Well, why not? NICHOLAS: Uh– MILO: Useless. You’re all so fucking useless. No one’s even trying, the only thing they’ve been concerned with finding is his replacement. NICHOLAS: I’m sure the police are doing all they can. MILO: Oh, you’re sure. And how much searching did you do before you sent me a conscription letter? NICHOLAS: I’m sorry, Milo. My hands were tied. But this doesn’t mean we’ve given up. I have every hope that Ashley will come back to us soon. MILO: Hope? Huh. NICHOLAS: Yes. Ashley’s smart, and capable of taking care of himself. I’m sure wherever he is, he’s doing everything in his power to come home. MILO: He doesn’t take–I took care of him. We took care of each other. I should be out there looking for him, but instead I’m sitting here with you. (pause) You were supposed to watch out for him. You were supposed to get him safely through the night. He promised me– [SHAKY BREATHS. MILO IS TRYING NOT TO CRY.] NICHOLAS: It’s all right. Take your time. MILO: He promised me he knew what he was doing. He promised I would never have to be without him. NICHOLAS: You have to believe he tried his best. It’s not his fault. MILO: Obviously it’s not his fault! It’s the Governor’s fault, it’s the Post’s fault, it’s your fault. NICHOLAS: I suppose that’s fair. MILO: No, it’s not. (sigh) Maybe…maybe it’s my fault. I let him tell me all those comforting white lies because it was easier than demanding the truth. I should have asked him to just run away with me. Gotten him out of here. NICHOLAS: Do you think that would have worked? Just up and leaving Gilt City? MILO: What are you saying, that he wouldn’t choose me over this place? Do you know something you’re not telling? NICHOLAS: I’m just saying I’ve been here a long time. I’ve been doing these interviews a long time, and I’ve met a lot of people in your position. MILO: In my position. Really. NICHOLAS: New to the Post, perhaps brought here by some kind of tragedy. Unsure what any of it means and furious at the injustice. Desperate for some kind of control, some agency. MILO: What are you, my know-it-all therapist? What’s your point? NICHOLAS: If there was an easy way out, don’t you think most people would take it? MILO: If Ashley–when Ashley comes back– NICHOLAS: Milo… MILO: We’re leaving. Both of us. NICHOLAS: Milo, I…I should tell you…he’s– [A DEEP VOICE, HEAVILY DISTORTED, SEEMS TO COME FROM ALL AROUND THEM. IT SOUNDS LIKE “STOP.”] MILO: What the hell was that? NICHOLAS: Let’s, uh–let’s just turn this off– [A CLICK, AND THE TAPE REWINDS.] RAE L.: (as the outro plays) The Night Post will return with Season 3 on May 18th, 2022. In the meantime, you can get more Night Post content by following us on Twitter, Tumblr, and Patreon, or by downloading our collection of stories on Ko-Fi. Check out our Redbubble shop to show your love for the Real Mailwives of Gilt City.